Tiny Terrors - Who Are Worth (More Than) Their Weight In Gold

Before I met my husband, I wasn't sure if I wanted kids or not. When I met him, it was clear that he did want them, and that I'd have to get on board with that to have a life with him. When, after we married, I came to worry that I might never be able to have kids naturally, I broke down in a torrent of tears so plentiful that even I was surprised as I shed them. At that moment, I realized I did want kids - I'd just been afraid that I would let them down. That I wouldn't be enough for them, or good enough for them.

Since becoming a mother, and one twice over, I've come to understand that these children are not my whole identity, but for me there will never be a more important piece of my identity. Before covid, I measured my days by how much time I'd have to be away from them. Every year is one more year with them. This show is something I am so tremendously proud of though it's still in its infancy, and it gives me an added sense of purpose. But these children -- my heart beats for them. When I wake up before them in the morning, I sometimes wonder how much longer before these two delightful beings wake so I can spend time with them. And at night, I look in on them and just think of the magnitude of my blessings....

So when I read today that they expect that 500,000 fewer babies would be born in the U.S. this year as a result of covid, I felt sad. How many people might miss out on knowing the joy kids like mine bring parents like me? But maybe it's like families of soldiers who went off to fight in WWII -- those like my grandfather didn't want to make babies before they left lest they die on the battlefield. (My grandfather told my grandmother selflessly that if he were struck down in war, she'd be able to remarry more easily if she didn't also have a child.) When he, thankfully returned safely, they began their family, as did so many others. I hope that these families will blossom, even if on a delayed basis. Even when they're crying, tantrum-throwing, mess-making tyrants, at least in my humble opinion, they are so, so worth it!

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